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ITK C302: The Celestial Queen

Once again, Sensei’s summoning magic distorts space and splits the skies.

The air, already tense from the Mother Earth Goddess and Mother Sea Goddess’ auras, jars even more.
Then, there appears another goddess—sacred, beguiling, and no less beautiful than the two before her.

The only difference is she’s a little more flamboyant than Demetersephone and Amphitrite, like a mirror reflecting glaring sunlight.

Such a goddess is the Mother Heaven Goddess, Hera.
She is one of the deities residing in the celestial realm and is the wife of Zeus.

Hera, the Mother Heaven Goddess.
Demetersephone, the Mother Earth Goddess.
Amphitrite, the Mother Sea Goddess.

The mother goddesses of the three realms have gathered in one place.

The first to speak is Hera, saying, “Let all women perish equally, except for me.”

Her first words are as harsh as a blazing fastball.

“Then mine own beloved Zeus will continue to look upon only me.”
“Yes, this is her.”
“Her despicable behavior is as refreshing as ever.”

Amphitrite and Demetersephone nod in agreement.
Wait, should they even be nodding here?!
She boldly said something off-putting!

“Saint, this Hera is known for her jealousy.”
“Yet her husband, Zeus, is an incredibly unfaithful man, making for the worst combination. Hundreds of mortal women have fallen victim to the unreasonable combination of Zeus’s infidelity and Hera’s jealousy…!”

That’s just the worst.

But to achieve their goal, her cooperation is essential. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have included such a bothersome individual.

We have to somehow persuade her to make the world a place where any couple can get married and have children.


The goddesses almost lost their temper several times, explaining the purpose of this meeting to Hera and asking for her cooperation. But she refused in one word.

“What? Wherefore?!”
“Verily, the realm of mortalkind is rid of all barriers. Be they of human, demon, or merfolk lineage, they art all comrades sharing the same world, albeit with different gods.”
“Indeed, why not beget offspring without regard for race, for those who art in love with one another?”
“To do so, we three goddesses entrusted with motherhood by the primordial goddess Gaia must agree to alter the setting of the world. Thine consent is also essential, is it not?”

The goddesses give one more push to persuade Hera but to no avail.

“I cannot approve of that notion.”
“But wherefore?!”
“More children mean more mortals in this world.”
“Is that not a valorous thing?”
“Not at all.”

What’s wrong with that?

“The more mortals there art, the more quite quaint women there shall beest, and Zeus shall commit more affairs.”
“Do thee think we care about that?!”

She doesn’t see anything but her husband.
How can someone like her be a mother goddess?

“Well, just think of me as a machine that automatically kills mine own husband’s mistresses. That way, thee shall not despise me…”

They will.
This goddess is nothing but problems.

“Hark thee, Hera. Think again,” resolutely says Amphitrite. “Mayhap this would be to thine own advantage. If we lift the ban on interspecies love, it might raise the marriage rates among mortals. Which in turn may decrease the number of women falling prey to thy wretched husband’s charms.”
“How? When thou art wed, thou canst not love another man. That is common sense, is it not?”
“Hah, thou art a fool beyond measure. Allow me to impart upon thee an important lesson,” confidently assures Hera. “Zeus hast nay regard for unmarried or married women.”
“Thy husband very much is the worst.”

Not only Amphitrite and Demetersephone, but also me, Dalkish, and the spectators all sigh in disbelief.

Truly a draining situation this is.

Sensei had already thrown in the towel early and started interacting with the crowd, giving blessings and names to newborns.

“I am ever glad that vile god has been imprisoned.”
“‘Tis true, Hephaestus hath trapped him in his labyrinth, hath he not? But fear not, for his works are trustworthy. Tell him not to release Zeus for fifty thousand years hence.”
“What madness! Doth thou not pity poor Zeus, trapped and alone? Wilt thou not aid mine own cause to set him free?”

No way.
That’s what everyone who’s heard the story so far thinks.

“Thou dost misunderstand! I love Zeus with all mine own heart! Even his roving eye I love dearly! But I cannot bear to be cheated on, so I would slay all the women in the world. What sayest thou to that?!”

No one would let you do that.
I’ve never heard the word “love” sound so hollow in my life.

“…Agh! I cannot doth this anymore! Just conversing with this woman makes my own brain wend mush!”
“I did get what she meant, but convincing this psychotic woman is impossible! I guess we hast to useth our last resort!”
“Saint, we beseech thee!”
“She is all thine, prithee!”

The two goddesses turn to me.
I kind of saw this coming if they couldn’t convince her.
But how am I supposed to convince a goddess with a loose screw?

“Um, excuse me.”

Anyway, I spoke to the goddess Hera.

“Oh, what dost thou require of me? If possible, couldst thee not talketh to me, mortal man?”
“You don’t just hate women, but men, too?”
“Yes, for mine own husband’s motto is ‘ugly men and women doth not deserve to exist.’”

That wretched god!!!
Never mind, we’ll be going on a tangent.
I’ll just focus on persuading her.

“You must be tired of talking. Would you like to take a break?”
“A break?”
“Yes, I have prepared a delicious treat for you, Your Radiance. Why don’t you eat it and relax?”

I bring a dessert I made back at the farm.

“It’s chocolate cake.”

This new cake was created with King Kaka’s help, a cacao spirit I recently met.
I managed to bypass Veil and Platy’s radars and brought it with me.

“What manner of food is this? It is black… Is it even edible?”

Despite being wary of the cake’s appearance, she silently takes a piece, perhaps out of being innately well-mannered, and elegantly eats it.

“Oh! This is goooooood!”

It satisfied her palate.

“What is this?! It is delicious! Truly exquisite! Such a moist pastry fused with the creamy mixture of sweet and bitter flavors!”
“Ah… There it goes…”
“I didst not want celestial deities to knoweth about the existence of this food, so this was our last resort.”

The other two goddesses looked bitter, but they, too, loosened up after eating the chocolate cake.

“This dessert hast putteth me in a fine humor. It seems that I could grant any wish at this moment!”
“Then please make it possible for mortalkind to marry and have children with other races.”
“Very well.”

That fast?!

And so, we got the three goddesses’ approval to revise the world’s order.
All races can now love other races and have offspring.
The world is one step closer to absolute harmony.

“Ah, how splendid.”
“Forsooth, I doth feel as though I have been through great trouble for such a small matter…”

Amphitrite and Demetersephone sigh in total exhaustion.

“Prithee, whence was this cake made? I would bestow a blessing upon the land whence it was created, so that none but the celestial gods may tread upon it, all for the sake of Zeus.”
“Nuh-uh, thou hast finished thy business, so do leave promptly.”
“Oh? But whatever is the matter? Pray, let us converse more since we have the opportunity. Oh? Oh…!”

Hera was forced to leave the mortal realm by the two goddesses.

“We cannot allow a celestial deity to discover the farm’s existence!”
“Indeed, we must ask Hermes to deceive her with all his might!”

Although we achieved our goal, we were left with indescribable fatigue and emptiness.

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7 months ago

I still think the Supreme Pimp Hand would’ve been vastly more fitting of a way to deal with this.

7 months ago

Poor Hermes, thou verily hath thine job cut out for thee.

7 months ago
Reply to  Icefury

Sounds like Saint needs to make a cake or some other item for Hermes for his efforts.

7 months ago

Dang. I feel sorry for them having to deal with Hera. They could say that if all mortals die then she won’t be able to eat anymore more of it, since only mortals can make it. Or something along those lines. 😂😅

Last edited 7 months ago by Shadow
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