C202: Vagabond Demigod

It’s me again.

We have a weirdo with us today.

It hasn’t even been that long since the elder spirit Arachne visited us. Man, our farm is getting more and more attention lately.

Anyway, the visitor reached the center of our farm, to our house’s porch without being discovered by neither Orkubo nor Pochi.
Which brings us to the question: Just who is this man, who is obviously no ordinary person for managing to slip past Orkubo’s defenses and Pochi’s nose?

At first glance, this young man looks like a human in his thirties, dressed like an ancient Greek philosopher with one shoulder exposed, and the loose fabric swaying in a way that obscures his build.
The edges of his clothes are tattered and frayed, giving the impression of a wandering ascetic monk.
His bare shoulder reveals his muscles, indicating that he’s well-toned, but it’s not because of his nimbleness that he was able to evade our farm’s security.

There’s something peculiar about this man’s very existence.
It’s like he’s a person, but also a mix of something more than one.

“…My name is Dionysus,” introduces the man himself. “Or so is the name my father gave me, but I prefer to introduce myself as my stage name, Bacchus, after he turned his back at us!!!”

It took me a while to realize that he was making a pun because of the way he said it so dramatically.

“Oh, I see… So, why are you here?”
“Because I’m Bacchus!”
“Enough with your puns!”

If you keep repeatedly doing that, I have a feeling they’ll eventually fall flat!

Just tell us what you are and what the purpose of your visit is!
You’re only throwing vague answers back at us, Bacchus!!!

“Demigod Bacchus? Yet another rare guest we have.”
“Oh, Sensei.”

Sensei the Lifeless King appeared next to me once again.

Thank you for coming to the rescue every time something baffling is going on!

“Lord Saint, this is Bacchus, the son of a mortal and a god. People like him are usually called demigods.”

‘Demigods’?

“They’re incredibly rare nowadays. A long time ago, way before the time when I was still alive, there used to be a lot of demigods. The gods descended to the earth with an interest in their own creations and indiscriminately formed relationships with them.”

And the most indiscriminate god at that time was Zeus, God of the Heavens.

As a natural consequence, a child was born to a mortal and a god and came to be called a demigod from then on.

Sure enough, they possess immense power and become heroes and eminent figures.

But their power was too much for the world to handle and ultimately upset its balance.

“Hence, the gods devised a plan and made a pact that they wouldn’t allow anyone to casually descend to the earth. Similarly, the demigods were welcomed into the realm of their divine parents and were also regarded as gods.”

That’s why no demigod walks the face of the earth… save for one.

“Demigod Bacchus was born to Zeus and a mortal, but he refused to follow the heavenly messenger and stayed here on earth.”
“You sure are well-informed. Immortal King, how did you find out so much about what happened even before you existed?”
“What are you talking about? Isn’t that what you yourself told me when we met before?”

Huh? What?
Are they acquainted with each other?

“Bacchus has been wandering around this world for well over two thousand years now. But he’s half-god, so he never seems to age or die.”
“I see, so we’ve met before. It seems what my brain needs, after a long time of wandering around, is some hocus pocus!”

Stop, please. It’s getting lamer.

…Wait, two-­thousand years?!
What in the world have you been doing wandering around for so long?

“Bacchus remains on mortal soil for one reason. He loves one thing with all his heart, and doesn’t have eyes on anything else other than that.”

Which is…

“Alcohol.”

Alcohol?

“Yes, I love alcohol from the bottom of my heart. Brewing it, drinking it, and making it known across the world is my focus!”
“This is how he’s been traveling around the world for two thousand years, discovering new kinds of alcohol, brewing it himself, and spreading it throughout the world.”

Demigod Bacchus, the eternally wandering alcohol propagandist.

…I’m beginning to understand why he came to our farm.

“One day, my Bacchus Sense picked something up. There was alcohol that I had never tasted before in the farthest reaches of the earth. So, I walked and walked in search of it!”

He traversed the wilderness, climbed mountains, crossed valleys, and got lost in forests.
It seems he had quite the journey before he finally reached our farm.

“I’ve reached my goal! Now, can I have some of your delicious brew?”
“No,” was my immediate answer.


“Waaaaaah! You mortals are such bulliesss!!!”

As soon as I rejected him, Bacchus started bawling his eyes out.
His tears are once again so dramatic that he doesn’t have any regard for his appearance.

“…”

I mean…
I don’t think it’s a good idea to give someone I literally just met what they want right away.

But I wasn’t expecting him to react so violently!

“Do you want some sort of compensation? You can have this!” he says as he takes something out.

What’s this?
Seeds?

“If you plant it, it will produce a bunch of small red fruits, which you can crush to release their extract! And if it rots properly, you can make alcohol out of it!”

So…grapes?
And wine?

“In exchange for this, I want to drink the alcohol you have! Isn’t it a fine deal?”
“…”

I have an idea of what Bacchus is looking for.

We obtained barley beer after I instructed Garra Rufa to research the brewing of alcohol.
Garra Rufa did a splendid job of fulfilling my request and developed a fizzy, refreshing beer.

I don’t know what kind of alcoholic beverage is popular in this world, but it’s got to be good… I think, since its raw materials are from another world.
At least, I definitely enjoy drinking it.

“…”

Oh well.

“It would be heartless to turn away someone who has traveled all this way just to drink the alcohol we make. Please follow me.”
“What? For real? Wow, this mortal is so kind!”

Bacchus follows me, skipping along.
This demigod is so carefree.


Since I’m going to offer an alcoholic drink, I might as well be thorough with it…

I chilled a glass stein made by the elves using Puffer’s special icebox and poured in the chilled beer.

It foamed up well.

I also prepared edamame as a side dish that I boiled in natural sea salt.

“HAH-HAH-HA!!!”

Bacchus grabs the stein and vigorously glugs the beer down his throat at an angle almost perpendicular to the ground.

Despite his reckless way of drinking, he didn’t spill a single drop.
The stein’s base makes a loud sound as it collides with the table’s surface.
Klunk!

“Another!”

I couldn’t help but applaud his exhilarating drinking manner.

“Just as I thought! No, it tasted even better than I expected! It was worth the trip to the ends of the earth! I want to brand this as the alcohol of the gods in the name of the demigod Bacchus!”

Hades already did that.

“However, mortal, what is this vegetable supposed to be? It’s hard to chew and strangely bitter!”

Bacchus is dissatisfied with the edamame.

Well, I can see why he has qualms with it.
He’s eating the whole pod.

It’s an otherworldly dish, yet I didn’t introduce it to him better.

You see, we don’t eat the pods, just the beans inside them.
You take the beans out of the pod…
By pushing them out through the side slit…
…Yeah!
That’s it!

“Oooooohhhh! This is good!”

It seems he also likes the edamame now.

“The boiled beans are soft and chewy with a tingling saltiness! The taste and texture enhance the bitterness of the alcohol! It’s the perfect combination!!!”

Eat edamame, drink beer, repeat.

The empty pods keep piling up.

“Bravo, mortal, bravo! You’ve done a fantastic job brewing this alcohol. I’m truly happy to have met you, so I’d like to commemorate this day.”
“Well, that’d be nice, but…”

Aren’t you acting differently from before?
It’s hard to notice because of the subtle change, but he’s being awfully polite and reserved with his language right now…

Then, Sensei answers my question.

“The more Bacchus drinks, the clearer his mind works and the more enlightened he becomes.”

So, he’s basically a reverse alcoholic.


did you notice my crap attempt at localizing the Bacchus pun? this colloquial Japanese ‘word’ (-bakkassu) was incessantly used in the former half of the chapter and sounds awfully close to how Bacchus is pronounced in Japanese (Bakkasu). after doing over 150 chapters of this author’s works, I can kind of understand how their sense of humor works (starfish and ‘staff-ish’ during the mermaid trio’s introduction if you can recall). so me, being the stubborn person that I am, decided to retain that in the English translation somehow, even if its almost a biiiiiiiiit of a stretch. in fact, most of the localized lines arent their exact literal translation, most notably being the first pun (father turned his back at us). I’m just grateful Zeus is an ass, so it still works. please don’t hate me for this, this is the first and last chapter im dealing with the bacchus puns, haha…

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